2 months

i thought he forgot. he didn't but he just didnt bring it up. its not that its not important. its just that, there are other more important things (i forgot what he really said about this, but i understand anyway)..

we still made this day special despite our frustrations. we really have a liking for fields. it was nice to see stars in the sky, and it was really cold. he is still sweet as always. i feel secure and happy and satisfied. although it meant risking getting home later than my expected time. i felt safe anyway because i know he's with me..

it just struck me that knowing that i have someone really special in my life now, it also worries me that i might lose him again. being both forward-looking, two months seemed to just fly by past us. but for me, i savored every moment of it. recalling all the thoughts that crossed my mind, every little significant thing that happened. maybe i am immersing myself too much into it. but this makes me happy, and quite irrational at times. but still, i trust him and myself that we can get past into any hardships. i am just hoping for the best now..

its been a while

i really resisted the temptation of updating here because of my stressful academic week. but now that i am temporarily free, its time to be ultimately cheesy and well, kinda problematic..

well, first of all, it was a rather disappointing comeback week for us. for one, we've been so busy. its like, the moment we went back to school meant that we dont have much time to spend together. it is frustrating. and in the short times that we are together, we dont seem to spend quality time. what is quality time to me anyway?

another thing, i really want to discuss some serious stuff about us, but i dont want to add to the things that really stress him out for the moment. he is handling two upcoming projects, plus his acad load is not really that light. plus, the pressure of elections (i dont even know if that's bothering him). on the other hand, i have my fair share of troubles myself. i dont want to get straight Ds in all my majors. i am so frustrated with myself as if i havent done anything right the moment 2nd sem started so now im suffering. crap.

so there, i really miss hanging out with him. and really enjoying and relaxing. but i suppose those things will have to wait.

one thing that really bothers me now is our intimacy. are we PDA-ing? i cant tell. but i really miss those bonding times. i wonder if he feels the same way.

another thing, i seem a bit insecure lately. what is wrong with me? with him? with us?

crap. i hate being melodramatic.

ayoko na lang malungkot

sobrang talaga akong nagwwallow sa fact na hindi ko siya nakikita..
minsan, bigla na lang ako natitigilan at naiisip kung ano sana ang pwede naming gawin together.. eeeewww..

super cheese. ano ba to.

hindi ko siya nakausap ngayon. siguro walang signal sa pampanga. rawr. bakit kaya ganun?

minsan, ayoko na lang magplurk kasi puro na lang tungkol sa kaniya ang napplurk ko. rawr na naman.

masyado nang boss-centric ang buhay ko. eeewww ulit.

nako, karen. ano buzz. have a life!

i so missed blogging

for one, im in school now.. after resting for five days at home, thus extending my long weekend, im back to my feet now.. im so happy to be back.. and so psyched to see him again..

although i wasnt able to see him for two days, we constantly keep in touch anyway so it made the painful days bearable, really..

in fact, when i was writhing in pain because of my antibiotic (apparently, i didnt eat enough for a heavy meal so my stomach started to react violently, i had to puke my lunch. it was really really painful. plus i hate puking, so it made the feeling a lot worse..), i had to distract myself so i could zone out the pain. i thought of happy moments. our conversation last night and the nights before, times we were together. and it really helped. got me the distraction i needed. before that, i was crying in pain (to think that i have a very high tolerance for pain), afterwards, almost no pain..

bad thing about it was, i couldnt eat too well.. im still afraid of the possibility of vomiting again. however, come lunch time, i wouldnt have much of a choice since i have to take the effing antibiotic again.. price i have to pay to get well soon enough (i hope!)

today, much as i would like to spend so much time with him, i have to catch up on my academics since im way behind already.. two prob sets due tomorrow and i wasnt able to work on those since i was still recuperating until yesterday.. but i still cant force myself to do a lot today.. i still have to be careful, else i'll be missing friday's party (oohh, what a lot at stake, hahahah)