just ignore, stream of consciousness

i think it's you..
although you think i've given up on you
and i've said it right on your face..
i lied..
and i have to, because i dont want to be selfish anymore
and i think its too much of me to ask you to stay..
you have a bright life ahead of you..
i'll get back to you when the time is right and when we're both ready to fight for what we feel..
bottom line is: it's not yet the right time..
and i'm pretty sure it'll come..
we just have to wait and have faith


but i think it's not fair..
i'm suppose to be happy enjoying my life..
but i have a fear that if i would find someone else..
I’ll lose all the chance of being with you again..
and i dont want that to happen..
i know we're meant for each other..
and each day is getting more and more difficult to live..
knowing that somebody out there wants to love me..
but i cant love him in return
because i still have feelings for you..
but i cant tell you that because it will make the whole thing complicated..
i'm just losing all my chances of being happy..
and in the end, i could be the only one losing..
alone and pathetic...
waiting in vain..